A Dose of Real
Have you ever stopped to think about how your life would have been different had you made different decisions along the way? I took a quick road trip with my husband this weekend and it gave us time to think about how all the life decisions have led us to this point. How messy life has been, we are a blended family with all the twists and turns that happen, 17 years of learning how to live together and blend together. Years of committing to love in spite of not even liking each other that day or week or month.
Relationships are like that, messy and always blending your view with another point of view. Social media has a way of either showing the best of relationships or mocking relationships with humor. Reality is somewhere in between. Oh, that doesn’t include third party views that look into your relationship and give their 2-cents. Well-meaning friends and family.
Decisions to Make
But when it comes right down to the day in and day out life you are the one who has to decide. You are the one who has to do the hard work in the relationship, make the hard decisions to let go of your wants and needs to serve the person lying next to you.
I’m at that age where new decisions are being made, new territory called retirement or as I like to say “repositioning”. Because retirement isn’t a word in the Bible I believe we are all called to continue to contribute to life for as long as we live. I’m also not one to just sit rocking away my “golden years”, phhtt, boring for sure. But with that said, my decisions are not made alone. My life partner, co-laborer, grounding force in my life called my husband is a part of how decisions are made. With that comes some negotiations and yes arguments and compromise.
Most recently we came to a financial agreement that includes honoring each other in new ways with our finances. Something that you hear a lot lately on social media is being debt free. That sounds wonderful but not so easy to achieve if you both have different viewpoints of what and how to do that. In my repositioning the one thing that needed to go was all the debt. Now that was a conversation that went for an entire day, through all three meals and beyond. Bottom line, we are now on the same page. We now have a deeper understanding of how money was modeled and talked about growing up. That’s huge people! When was the last time you hashed out something so personal as finances with your spouse or partner? Better yet, when was the last time you saw an honest post on social media from the debt free community about how many arguments over money have happened? That’s real life people.
For Good, Bad and Ugly
Living your life with the real good, the real bad and even the ugly is how we learn about ourselves and each other. It’s how we grow into deeper relationships, honor our marriages and others. A dose of reality from living is life is messy and you really can’t avoid it, but you can walk through it with decisions that unite your relationships and give you a more abundant life together.
Take the Challenge
My challenge for you is to look at where in your relationships it’s been messy. What decisions by you, yes own it, have contributed to the mess? Now what decisions do you need to make to increase the abundance in that relationship? If it is truly a toxic relationship, consider stepping away and possible professional help. But if it’s truly a normal, messy, living life together relationship then make the decisions today that will give you the abundant life you want together in the future. Consider doing Discover Your Real Life together as a team (special pricing for 2 or more people) and see where your lives are going together, working together to create the lives you were meant to live together.